Yesterday couldn't have gone better. From beginning to end it was a great day. I spent time with friends, was able to work, and saw a movie to boot. Yesterday's over and I guess I am dealing with its fall-out. Yes, there is the awareness of homework yet to be completed and a rather lengthy day at work to look forward to; but what am I to do in the good times. Truth be told I listened to Sara Grove's song, "Painting Pictures of Egypt," a song about what to do when we are thrown into the chaotic beauty of real life.
I have lived too many years in a dormant winter place, a slave to the routine of it all. It wasn't good, it just wasn't frightening because it didn't require too much. I could take the bad; I really could! Not just the mediocrity, the bad! I could stand the rejections, and firings, and even the ennui that mediocrity heaps out upon us. Now that I am in Greek and working at Starbucks, I can take that too. It is painful and the rewards aren't that noticeable.
But what am I to do with a day as wonderful as yesterday? What am I to do when I get blown away by one good thing after another? I felt close to God in my suffering of futility.1 But, when things shake out for good, I am totally at a loss. Perhaps, just as we are to give our problems to God, maybe we are to give our good feelings back to God. I am not talking about "giving thanks" here. I am talking about something else that I just can't quite put my finger on. Maybe things were just too out of the ordinary that my brain is having trouble taking it all in; or maybe it was so good that I would rather not know how good things could be when I contemplate how mundane my life usually is.
In any case, I will give thanks to God and ask for His help, even on the good days.
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